By Joan Endicott
Looking out at the far-off mountain, Joy let out a slow sigh, almost whispering to GiGi. “Do you ever get tired of things changing?”
Princess, the little pup lying at their feet, let out her own sleepy sigh—content to simply be.
“Change is hard,” said GiGi softly, “and it can make things feel shaky.”
“I hate when things feel shaky. Why can’t things just stop…changing?” Joy asked quietly.
GiGi leaned her cheek against Joy’s soft hair.
“Change makes me sad too sometimes,” GiGi said. “When it’s a hard change, it’s completely normal for your heart to feel heavy. It’s normal to miss the way things used to be. When we love things deeply, it hurts when they change or go away. Feeling sad simply shows you care. That’s when you get to give yourself extra kindness.”
Joy twirled a piece of lavender between her fingers, enjoying its fresh fragrance. “It’s so hard when people change,” she whispered.
GiGi rubbed Joy’s back gently. “Oh yes, my love. It sure can be.”
Joy looked up. “Why do they do it?”
“Well, life changes us all,” said GiGi. “It shapes us the way the wind shapes the trees. But sometimes, it’s also that we didn’t really know someone very well in the first place… and it just seems like they changed.”
Joy rested her head against GiGi’s arm, watching a butterfly flutter toward the lavender.
“And sometimes,” GiGi continued, her voice very gentle, “people act differently because they are carrying something heavy. I know there are times I have seemed distant and quiet to others—even those I loved deeply.”
“You?” asked Joy in surprise.
“Oh, yes,” GiGi nodded. “When I was going through hard things. Like if I haven’t felt well, or when I felt lonely for someone special, or when a loved one passed away. A hurting heart makes us act differently.”
Joy looked down at the little dog sleeping happily by their feet. “Like Princess,” she said softly.
“Exactly like Princess,” GiGi smiled. “Remember when she first came to live with me?”
“She was a growly-scowly-grouch!” Joy said in a funny voice which tickled them both.
“Yes, she pulled away and sometimes growled when I tried to touch her. Because the people she used to live with were unkind, she learned to try and protect herself. Her little heart was wounded.”
“I remember you told me, ‘Hurt people hurt people.’ Sooo, it’s the same for puppies?” Joy whispered.
“It certainly is,” GiGi agreed. “Before Princess could be her happy, healthy self, she needed to know she was safe and loved.”
Joy let her hand rest softly on the little sleeping pup.
“But what if everything around us is changing so much—so shaky—that it feels like a big ol’ storm?” Joy asked. “How do we feel safe then?”
“That’s a great question,” GiGi said. She laid back on the grass, staring up at the blue sky and puffy clouds. “Do you remember the story of Peter and Jesus on the water?”
Joy nodded and snuggled down next to her. “Peter stepped out of his boat right into the big waves.”
“He did,” GiGi grinned. “It was very brave. And as long as he kept his eyes on Jesus, he walked right on top of that stormy water.”
GiGi gently stroked Joy’s hair as she continued. “Do you remember what happened when he took his eyes off Jesus and focused on the storm instead?”
“He got really scared,” Joy whispered. “And he started to sink.”
“Yes, and I can relate to Peter all too well,” GiGi said with a wink. “Peter couldn’t change or control the storm. The one thing he could control was what he focused on.”
Joy thought for a while and then asked, “So…when things get stormy, how do I keep from looking at those scary waves?”
“Well, we will see and feel the waves—that’s natural. But like Peter showed us, with God’s help, we can do what is super-natural, by choosing to look past the waves and the storm to The One who controls them. The best news of all is that God, the One who controls all of life’s storms, never changes. His Word and His promises never change. He always loves you, He is always with you—those things are always true!”
Joy stroked Princess’s warm, soft fur. The pup rested her chin on Joy’s lap and let out a soft sigh.
“But GiGi,” Joy whispered, “if God controls the waves…why does He let scary storms come at all? Why can’t we just have the sunny days?”
“Oh, sweetheart,” GiGi sighed gently, her hand joining Joy’s to pet the sleeping dog. “That is one of those huge, God-sized questions—the kind we simply can’t answer.”
Joy looked up as a wind gust rustled the branches in the big juniper tree.
“When there is a storm outside, the most important thing is to stay focused on the One who controls it,” GiGi explained softly. “And then, we simply do our part to control what we can.”
“The things I can control,” Joy remembered.
“Exactly,” GiGi smiled. “We stop trying to control the things in the big world around us, and we focus on what we can control in the little world inside us.”
GiGi traced the top of Princess’s little head. “When we are right in the middle of the wind, it is so easy to only look at the scary things. That is when we get to train our hearts and our brains to look for the beauty.”
“How do I train my brain?” Joy asked.
“By choosing what you notice,” GiGi smiled. “Gratitude is the best way to reset a sad, shaky heart. When things are hard, it is important to give ourselves space to feel those big feelings and be kind to ourselves.”
GiGi rested her hand over Joy’s.
“And then, even though it is natural to keep looking at what we have lost, there comes a time when we get to focus on what we have left,” GiGi whispered. “We get to tuck all those beautiful memories safely inside us and then open our hearts to add new memories of the beautiful blessings still to come.”
Joy sat quietly, listening to the steady breathing of the little pup resting safe across her lap.
“Sooo…it seems like everything is always changing,” Joy said thoughtfully.
“Yes, life is all about change,” Gigi paused. “Like the weather. We enjoy the sunshine and blue skies while they’re here, while also knowing the rain and storms will someday come. Even though we can’t stop the storm from coming, we always get to choose how we respond when it does. That is what we can control.”
Joy sat up a little. “What do you mean?”
“Well, when a sudden rainstorm comes, we have a few choices,” GiGi smiled. “We can choose to be upset by it and let it steal our joy, we can grab an umbrella and just keep going…”
Suddenly, GiGi jumped to her feet. Her eyes sparkled as she reached down and grabbed Joy’s hand, pulling her up.
“…Or,” GiGi laughed, raising one hand high in the air as if holding an invisible umbrella, “we can run right into it and dance in the rain!”
GiGi picked up Joy and twirled her around over the grass. Princess joined them with a happy little bark, wagging her tail and prancing in circles right along with them. The quiet afternoon burst with even more giggles and laughter.
When they finally flopped back down onto the warm grass, catching their breath, GiGi gently took Joy’s hands.
“Choosing to dance? Choosing your umbrella?” GiGi smiled softly. “That is you getting to simply control your…controllables.”
“…Controllables!” Joy finished with her, still catching her breath from the giggles.
“Change happens to everything and everyone, sweetheart. Look at my hands.”
Joy leaned over and placed her hand on one of GiGi’s weathered hands. “They hurt, don’t they?” she asked.
“Yes, they ache, and they don’t work like they used to—and they certainly don’t look like they did when I was younger.”
“I’m sorry, GiGi. That must be hard.” Joy patted her hands tenderly.
“Oh, thank you, sweetie. It is. Some days are harder than others.” GiGi hugged Joy extra tight. “And when it feels hard and stormy, that’s when ‘I Get To!’® choose—even more—to focus on what I can control…and if I will dance in the rain!” GiGi smiled, her eyes shining.
“I can choose to focus on what I’ve lost or focus on all I have left. I choose to think about all the beautiful ways these hands have served me. I remember all the things I’ve been able to do: plant flowers, cook meals, drive a car, take care of myself and those I love. Some of my favorites are holding and rocking babies…and the thousands of times they’ve helped me give the hugest hugs! We always get to choose what we look for: the crinkles and wrinkles,” GiGi winked, “or the beautiful life that made them.”
“Kinda keeps coming back to choosing that gratitude lens, doesn’t it, GiGi?” Joy smiled softly.
“Yes, my love. That’s what it always comes back to,” GiGi whispered. And with her beautiful, weathered hands, she pulled Joy in for one of her longest, hugest hugs.
“In everything give thanks!” —1 Thessalonians 5:18a
Joan Endicott is a keynote speaker, coach and author. Her “I Get To!”® message has encouraged people in over 30 countries to make a simple shift in perspective and discover the miraculous life they already have. To receive your FREE copy of her book and ongoing encouragement, visit www.JoanEndicott.com and follow @JoanEndicott.
