By Larry Banta
Only a few days to go until Christmas but, for me at 5 years of age, those days were so long. I was very impatient to get to that special day. To have to wait for something, a special day, a special trip, good news, is sometimes hard. Learning patience is of great help in getting along well in life.
Over the last few columns, we have looked at some of the attributes of the fruit of the spirit from Galatians 5:22, 23: But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. The fourth attribute is patience.
As I started thinking about this, I became aware of all kinds of ways I was not patient. I found myself stuck in traffic several times. I was not real patient. A few days ago, I was on my way home from working on my former office that I need to sell. I had plans for the day, lots of things I needed to do. On my way home the truck in front of me suddenly braked. I was able to stop, but the car behind me did not stop and crashed into my car. I was not hurt much but was told by the police officer who came to the scene that I needed to go to the ER to get checked out. I spent the rest of my day dealing with insurance and waiting in the hospital (where everyone knew me). I chose to be patient and use the time to read and relax. My visit showed no serious injury, fortunately, so I was able to head home. When I chose to be patient, there was minimal stress.
In Scripture patience is defined as follows: The Greek word makrothumia (μακροθυμία) means “long-suffering,” “patience,” “forbearance,” or “slowness to anger”. It combines makros (long) and thumos (temper or passion), literally describing a person who has a “long-tempered” reaction and holds back anger for a long time before acting (NKJV Strong’s Bible).
This speaks of a mature way to react to anything that might be a bother, big or little. In many places in the Bible, patience is also associated with endurance. What is our reaction when life is hard, we are treated unjustly, things are not working out like we want them to? How do we react with real hardship and difficulty? Facing difficulty with an attitude of patience, we can stop and think, pray for help, and trust in God to get us through it. Then stress is much lower, and our mind remains much clearer. With practice, that is our first response.
Titus 3:2 tells us: Teach the older men to exercise self-control, to be worthy of respect, and to live wisely. They must have sound faith and be filled with love and patience.
We live in an instant culture. We have instant coffee, instant breakfast, microwave meals. If we need something, we order it online and it may even arrive later in the same day. We have questions about something and ask our computer and have the answer (may not be the right one) instantly. Early in my medical practice we had beepers. The hospital would call the beeper and wait for 15 to 30 minutes for me to call back unless they put 911 on the message. I would hurry to the nearest pay phone and call in.
Then cell phones and texting arrived. If I didn’t answer within one or two minutes, they would call again, concerned. We changed our expectations to instantaneous. We no longer needed patience to wait for something. Our current generation of children and some adults are very connected to their devices, expecting friends to respond in minutes or seconds or think maybe they are being ghosted. The concept of patience is no longer considered a virtue; expectations are that answers come instantly.
Having this expectation of instant responses leads us to experience more stress, anger and frustration. We have become like children impatiently awaiting Christmas Day, not for the true meaning but for what is under the tree for them. Impatience can cause a good bit of distress. The anger and frustration take a toll on our bodies which can affect the stomach, cause headaches, depression and anxiety, as well as increase the blood pressure.
We prove ourselves by our purity, our understanding, our patience, our kindness, by the Holy Spirit within us, and by our sincere love (2 Corinthians 6:6).
Having patience is of great service to ourselves as well as those we interact with. As with all spiritual disciplines we must first recognize our need in a particular area, and with the help of the Holy Spirit, we can truly become more patient and understanding.
Be still in the presence of the LORD,
and wait patiently for him to act.
Don’t worry about evil people who prosper
or fret about their wicked schemes.
Stop being angry!
Turn from your rage!
Do not lose your temper—
it only leads to harm (Psalm 37:7,8 NLT).
Here are some ways we may be able to improve our patience:
There are many examples throughout the Bible of people waiting on God. His time frame is not the same as ours. Simeon, at the birth of Jesus, had waited his entire life to hold the Lord’s anointed. Abraham awaited a son for a long time, until Sarah was way beyond child-bearing years, but the son did come as promised. Joseph “trained” for 17 years before God put him in charge of all of Egypt. We must trust in Him, stay patient, endure, and He will fulfill His promises.
Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive (Colossians 3:12).
As the holidays come with all the preparations and tasks to complete, we need to slow down, be still before our God, and reset our priorities. Our focus must be on Him. As the world is rushing about for the latest and greatest gifts, we must reflect on the true and greatest gift, a Savior who was born into this corrupt world having come to save us. Our thanksgiving is directed to the Provider of our many blessings. The world wants us to get caught up in the latest trends and forget the true meaning of the season. Simplifying the celebration to maintain the true meaning will pull us out of the rush and allow us to be patient and filled with joy!
We also pray that you will be strengthened with all his glorious power so you will have all the endurance and patience you need. May you be filled with joy, always thanking the Father (Colossians 1:11-12a NLT).
Dr. Larry Banta is an author of several books, a retired psychiatrist, and a former missionary. He served in India, Mexico and Kenya. He and his wife, Evelyn, a counselor, travel together to provide consultation and training in various international locations. A helpful resource for working with foster and adoptive children is “Help for the Hurting Child” by Dr. Banta and available on Amazon.
