Real Man’s Toolbox – Manhood – Where the Rubber Hits the Road 

By Leo Hellyer 

What is manhood? Well, quite honestly, it appears that it depends on who you ask. It also appears to change over time. If you asked someone in 1950 what manhood was, you would get a completely different answer than if you asked someone in 2024. When God created mankind, He created them as man and woman, in His image, but each with their own distinct differences. 

This column is titled Real Man’s Toolbox so we are going to delve into manhood, and particularly Christian manhood. Many young men, and young women, did not have a great example of manhood around them when they were growing up. Without this foundational example, many young people of today have no idea what manhood means, or what a real man looks, sounds, or acts like. 

There is a wonderfully enlightening book called, “The Measure of a Man” written by Gene Getz, which presents twenty attributes of a godly man. On the back cover of the book it states, “True masculinity is not measured by strength, wealth, or position, but by twenty biblical qualities drawn from the Apostle Paul’s letters to his young protégés Timothy and Titus. Inspiring, encouraging and practical, this classic book shows how you can measure up to Christ’s fullness as a husband, father, and mentor to other men.” 

A few of the key attributes that Getz presents in his book are: Building a Good Reputation, Living a Balanced Life, Avoiding Destructive Behavior, and Becoming a Disciplined Man. This is the type of a book that you can go back to from time to time – and get something new each time. 

One of the foundational Bible passages in this book is 1 Timothy 3:1-7, where we read about overseers and deacons, leaders of the church. These attributes are also applicable for leaders of the family, neighborhood, business, community and nation. 

Building a Good Reputation takes a lot of time and effort. To build a good reputation, you must have something to judge by. For a Christian man, our template for a good reputation of course is Jesus Christ. Yes, I agree, we will never achieve the reputation of Jesus Christ, but we can and should strive every day to become more and more Christ-like. A good reputation is something that must be worked on every moment of every day. One slip up can tarnish a good reputation in an instant. We should not compare ourselves to other men, but to the example of Jesus Christ. We must live in this world, but not become of this world. 

Living a Balanced Life can be extremely difficult in the world we live in today. There are many distractions and challenges to take us off course in our journey of life. There are many things that can pull at a man’s heart: family, business, finances, politics, relationships, leisure activities, possessions, etc. Getz refers to Philippians 4:6-7 in addressing how to live a balanced life. “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Our lives will remain balanced if we will keep our eyes and our hearts on Jesus Christ and His example. 

To be a godly man, we also need to Avoid Destructive Behavior. There is no shortage of destructive behaviors for us to fall into. One of the key doorways into destructive behaviors is isolation. When we isolate, we look into anything that we can to validate ourselves, and many times we end up following destructive behaviors. Once again we must keep our focus on the Lord, and remember that the only way we can overcome the temptations that Satan places in our path is through the strength of Jesus Christ.   

Another attribute of a godly man is to Become a Disciplined Man. Getz points out that the best way to be a disciplined man is to “fix our eyes on Jesus.” When we have lived our lives on this earth for a while, we get to the point where we know the answers to how to be a godly man. A disciplined man is one who consistently ignores the temptations of Satan and takes the hard road and does what is right, true, and godly. Disciplined men are consistent men. Disciplined men are men who are humble, obedient to God, pray consistently, and have servant’s hearts. 

To tie everything up in a neat bundle, Getz closes out this book with Romans 12:1-2. “Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.”    

I highly recommend that you add “The Measure of a Man” by Gene Getz to your Real Man’s Toolbox. This should be a foundational part of your Christian library for living. Real men are led by God, interact with the society around them, are willing to take a stand, and do all things in love. 

Leo Hellyer is a non-staff pastor with a local church and has been married to his wife Norma for 50 years. The couple volunteered with the Boise FamilyLife Ministry Team for 20 years. Leo has also been serving with Boise Rescue Mission Ministries for 20 years and is currently serving at the River of Life Rescue Mission. He is president and chief firearms instructor with Helping Hands Firearms Training LLC. If you have questions about Real Man’s Toolbox, or need other assistance, he may be reached at [email protected] or (208) 340-5544.